The Potluck Committee
by Her Sweetness
Summary: [Oneshot] It's Kaiba Corp's first and probably last annual Thanksgiving potluck.


Disclaimer: See no evil, speak no evil, own no Yu-Gi-Oh!

Her Sweetness: Hey, all. Just a little pre-Christmas month one-shot for you all since I haven't done a one-shot in who knows how long… Hope you enjoy this!

* * *

— The Potluck Committee —

* * *

There was a nippiness in the air of Domino, the fall weather settling in finally after the weeks upon weeks of heat and sweating. In the heart of Central Domino, a small boy with long black hair and an orange and red scarf on lugged a bag from Subway along with him on the sidewalk. His middle school had let out for Thanksgiving break and he had the week to spend hanging out at Kaiba Corp with his beloved brother and thus far he had brought his brother lunch everyday.

"Woo," he heaved, lifting the bag up onto his shoulder. Looking up, he saw that he was in front of the Kaiba Corp building, the windowpanes shining in the sun.

"W-Wait! Mr. Kaiba! Sir, please—"

Crash! Bang!

Mokuba sweatdropped. "Oh no… Seto, please don't lose your temp—"

The window was opened quickly and then a laptop went flying out. Mokuba gasped and ran about ten feet to the left, narrowly escaping the crash of the computer as it hit the cement and sprawled into a thousand pieces. Others on the sidewalk stopped as well and looked up. Mokuba smiled at them. "Hey, it wasn't as bad as it could have been!"

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! SIR, NO! PLEASE!"

Mokuba's head jerked up at hearing the distressed cries and saw that a man was being pushed out of the window, head first. Mokuba squealed and ran inside the building, knocking over a secretary or two. Wasting no time, he climbed the stairs up to the tenth floor, utterly out of breath by the time he reached his brother's floor and scrambled inside the office.

Kaiba was standing behind his desk at one of the large windows which was thrown open. He had the torso of one of his assistants in his hands and was forcing him out of the window. Mokuba recognized the young man as one of the newbies that had started just a week ago.

"PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME!"

"Shut up!" Kaiba shouted, forcing his head down. "If you don't let me throw you out of this window, you're so fired!"

"Seto!" Mokuba cried, running over. "Seto, wait a minute, calm down!"

"Mokuba, this is grown folks' business! Butt out!"

"OH GOD…!"

"Seto!"

"Mokuba!"

"_JESUS_!"

Mokuba tackled his brother to the ground, managing to get him off of the employee long enough for the man to run out of the office and probably out of the building via the staircases.

After a moment or so, Kaiba stood, brushing his younger brother off of him. Mokuba fell to the ground in a clump and looked up at his highly annoyed brother, rubbing his head. "Um. Seto? What was that all about?"

"I was _trying _to relieve stress!" he countered, sitting heavily in his leather chair. "Then you had to come along and ruin it. I should send you home for the day, just for that."

"But I saved his life!"

"Well, you're ruining mine."

Mokuba huffed. Instead of trying to reason with him, he went over to the center of the room where he'd dropped the bag of subs after entering the room. He picked it up and gathered the napkins that had fallen out of it and came over to his brother's large, mahogany desk, dumping out the two sandwiches.

"Yours is here," he said and pointed at the foot long, taking his own six inch sub away to one of the other seats in the room.

Kaiba opened the wrapper and looked at it.

Mokuba looked at him over his sandwich. "I had them toast it, just like you like."

"It's cold though."

"Ugh!"

"… I asked for onions."

"Look, I did the best I could, _okay_?" he shrieked.

Kaiba sighed. "This entire month has been one disappointment after another. First that deal with Sunco fell through. Then the _R_ on our sign out front fell off and the company that usually does the repairs are all on strike so we're now Kaiba _Cop_. I ran out of toilet paper in the bathroom yesterday. A bird with serious problems left a glob of bloody excrement on my windshield this morning. And now I've got a cold sandwich with no onions."

Mokuba paused and narrowed his eyes. "Seto, stop being emo and eat your sandwich."

"I'm not _being_ emo."

"Cheer up, big brother. I know this is your busiest month but things will look up. And just look at all the money you're making."

"Pheh."

Sighing, the younger of the two set what was left of his sub down in the chair and shuffled out of the office. When he came into the area of cubicles surrounding his brother's office, heads peeked up over the partitions.

"Well?" one employee asked. "What happened? We saw the way Alex ran out of there and we heard the screams."

"Why the heck didn't you guys do anything then?" Mokuba asked. "I almost didn't make it in time!"

A woman laughed incredulously. "And get our_selves_ thrown out of a window? No thanks."

He groaned.

"Plus," added the man, "Mr. Kaiba's been working us to death lately. It's like this every year. Long hours, no extra pay and we don't get much time to spend with family. On Thanksgiving day, we only get five minutes extra added to our lunch break!"

Mokuba blinked. "But you guys got fifteen extra minutes last year."

"We just got a memo."

"_Cutbacks_," said another.

"Whew!" Mokuba shook his head. "I feel for ya. Glad it's not me."

At seeing Mokuba's nonchalance, they all wondered why they even confided in him.

Just then, the large double doors opened and Kaiba's head popped out. Everyone except Mokuba scattered back to their respective places. Kaiba grunted and he walked down the middle of the aisle and turned the corner. Mokuba followed him, holding his hands up to the heads that still peeked. He mouthed: It's going to be okay!

One floor down, Mokuba saw his brother entering the men's room. He followed inside and caught the brunet just before he entered a stall.

"Mokuba, what're you doing in here? It's the men's room."

"… Hey! I'm a boy too!"

"Nobody can tell with all that hair on your head."

"…"

"Let me cut it."

"_No_."

"Then what are you doing in here?"

"I came to talk to you about something, Seto," he said. "The employees, they aren't very happy with the new work schedule for the holidays."

"…"

"… Seto?"

"… Oh, is this the part where I care?"

"Please, just hear me out, big brother!"

"Fine, fine. But we talk while we work."

"Work…?" Mokuba watched as his brother entered a stall and latched it behind him. Mokuba pulled a face. "That is so gross, Seto…"

"So what about the workers?" he asked.

"Oh… right." Mokuba backed up and sat on the counter by the sinks and trash basket. "Well, you're only giving them a few minutes added on to their lunch breaks for Thanksgiving. Most companies don't even have their employees working on that day."

"That's why most companies don't have our rep."

"Okay… fair enough. But what about the employees?"

"What about them? Five minutes is long enough to eat a turkey sandwich and some stuffing, right?"

"But it isn't festive!" Mokuba wailed.

There was a pause. "Alright, calm down, you. What do you suggest be done?"

Mokuba thought for a minute. He scratched his chin slowly and then said, as if enlightened, "I got it! Seto, what if we all throw a little Thanksgiving party for the building. Like, a potluck, nothing too fancy. But everyone can bring something so no one will feel left out."

"That sounds stupid and time-consuming."

"It's neither of those things! It'll be fun, you just watch, and it'll make them happy so they can get on your nerves less and you won't have to catapult anyone out of a tenth floor window."

"Mokuba, we're a serious company with serious—"

"_Problems_, and the workers need a pick-me-up!"

"… Are you sure about this?"

"Positive!"

"Fine… but this is on your head, kiddo."

Mokuba smiled. "Thanks, Seto. You won't regret it!"

"Yeah, sure…" There was a pause and a slight sound of the moving of a toilet paper roll. Suddenly, Kaiba shouted, "AGH! NOT AGAIN!"

* * *

The sign-up sheet was tacked up on one of the cubicles a little later that afternoon. Mokuba stood back from it, looking up at his work proudly.

"What's this, Mokuba?" a passerby said, looking at the yellow sheet.

"We're having a Thanksgiving potluck, everyone!" he announced, turning around to the others. "This is the sign-up sheet, so please put your name and what you're going to bring on Thursday."

They blinked. "And Mr. Kaiba is okay with this?"

"Sure, I talked to him."

"When?"

"When he was using the bathroom."

Everyone looked around thoughtfully.

* * *

On Wednesday night, the Kaiba brothers rode home in their limo, Mokuba with the sign-up sheet in hand. For the past two days, the entire building had been abuzz with the news of the potluck. It was the first one in Kaiba Corp history, as far back as Gozaburo's reign. If someone had suggested such a thing to that man, they would have gotten a lot worse than a toss out of a window.

"I think we have all the bases covered," Mokuba said, smiling down at the sheet.

"Lemme see that," said the elder Kaiba, snatching up the paper from the boy's hands. He scanned it quickly. "Turkey, stuffing, okay… What? Mokuba!"

Mokuba began to whistle.

"Just what the hell is this? I'm not bringing a pumpkin pie."

"But, Seto, it's tradition!"

"Screw tradition; you said this was a thing for the employees, Mokuba. I don't have time for something like this. You know I'm a busy man. And another thing, what's with this blah blah blah…"

Mokuba had already turned on his iPod.

* * *

At their mansion in North Domino, Kaiba was in his home office, sulking about being overruled by his brother's iPod, which, he said to his brother all the time, he could have invented if he had so been inclined. In truth, Kaiba was a bit on edge. He was regretting saying yes to this entire thing. In the past two days, the staff had been putting up decorations around the office such as tinsel, carved pumpkins and some fall-scented candles everywhere that made him sneeze violently.

As such, he had holed up in his office to try and get away from all that but every time he shut his door, Mokuba came in unannounced and threw the doors wide open, stating that he was being unsociable and telling him to get into the togetherness spirit. Unfortunately, Mokuba had swung open Kaiba's doors while he was surfing some interesting sites and having some much needed "me time." Mokuba was somewhat unaffected by it but Kaiba could have done without the group of female secretaries walking by.

Restless with these thoughts of disaster, he closed his laptop on his desk and got up from his seat, making his way downstairs to find his brother.

"Hey, Mokuba! Where are you?"

"In here," sang a prepubescent voice from the vicinity of the kitchen. Kaiba ventured that way. When he came in, he saw pots and pans out and batter on the counter and his brother at the sink, stirring something in a blue apron and his hair up in a ponytail with a pink scrunchie.

"Oh my god… where did you get that ridiculous hair tie?"

"Ryou."

"… I don't want him over here anymore."

"I'll just go over to his house."

Kaiba sincerely hoped this rebellious stage was coming to an end.

"Listen," he said irritably, "don't you think this is a bit much? Why are you making a pumpkin pie? That's what the maids are for. Hell, that's what_ Wal-Mart _is for!"

"_You're_ really the one who's supposed to be making this, you know."

"No."

Mokuba stopped stirring for a moment, pausing only to squint at his brother, then returned to his task. "What're you going to say you're thankful for tomorrow?"

"A brother who listens to me. Oops, wait, don't have one of those."

"You're so mean, Seto!"

"E-mail me when I'm supposed to care," he said and walked away. He came back a second later, dipped his index finger into the batter and then licked it, walking away again. Mokuba frowned.

"I hope you washed your hands…"

"Nope!"

* * *

The next morning, the two brothers were back in their limo again, being chauffeured to Kaiba Corp. Mokuba had his pie in hand and was quite proud of how it had turned out, despite his brother's constant poking about the kitchen. Kaiba, however, was in a less than cheerful mood. He sat beside Mokuba and huffed until he was given some attention.

"Seto… I was just wondering," he said thoughtfully, "why don't we ever go back to the orphanage and celebrate with the orphans there? We could buy them a really nice thanksgiving dinner, hang out and everything. Wouldn't it be fun?"

Kaiba sneered. "Sorry, Mokuba, but my idea of a fun day does not include hanging around in a rusted building, eating succotash and green bean casserole with a bunch of snot-nosed brats. And besides, the orphans we knew when we were there are all on their own now. And even if they _weren't_, my answer would still be the same!"

"… Damn, you're mean."

"Watch your mouth."

"Make me!"

Kaiba reached over and dug his finger deep into the pie, twisting it and then pulling it out.

Mokuba watched with watery eyes as his brother licked his finger clean.

"SSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOO!"

* * *

"Um… what's wrong with him, sir?" someone asked as Kaiba came up to the tenth floor of the building with his wailing brother in tow.

Kaiba waved away the concern. "He's fine. Give the man your pie, Mokuba."

Mokuba tearfully handed it over.

The man smiled. "Wow, this looks great, sir… Um… why is there a—"

"_Ask him_!" Mokuba pointed violently to his brother.

Everyone looked at the CEO and he yawned lazily. "Alright, let's get this thing going. I've got work to do and so do the rest of you."

"But sir," said an employee, "It's just ten o' clock."

"Yeah, and?"

"It's supposed to be Thanksgiving _dinner_."

Kaiba frowned. "Right, and waste the rest of the day? What's wrong with you people? Your food's all here, isn't it? Do you want it all to get cold?"

"Well, we have a microwave—"

"I said get in there and eat!" he roared.

Everyone scattered.

Walking over into the main part of the office, the Kaiba brothers saw the table set up with a red cloth covering it. People had brought sodas and casseroles, stuffing and everything that was assigned. That put a little glow on Mokuba's tear-sodden face.

"Wow, you guys! See, Seto, they did a great job. And you thought something would go horribly wrong."

Kaiba walked over and squinted at the food. "I don't know, Mokuba. Something seems off. We better not eat it."

"Stop being so cruel, Seto, everyone worked really hard on their dishes."

"Some people look like they worked too hard. This turkey looks burnt."

Mokuba looked at the large hunk of meat that sat in a platter in the center of the table. A good portion of it was already carved out as most people had begun to eat and mingle. The meat itself was blackened and the people eating it seemed to be having a bit of trouble getting it down.

Mokuba sighed and got a paper plate from the pile, beginning to carve into the odd looking turkey.

"Don't do it," Kaiba said warningly.

"Seto… don't be so mean… jeez, this is tough… everyone worked so hard… the least you could do is try some…" He continued to carve and suddenly a chunk popped out. "Ah, there we go. Now onto the stuffing." He moved down the table and his brother followed him cautiously. "Seto, could you get me a plastic fork?"

"Sure," he said and went off.

Mokuba poked the turkey in his brother's absence. Suddenly, one of the workers came over, a man in his late forties with glasses and a striped tie, and he whispered to Mokuba, "Listen… I like you."

Mokuba blinked.

"And I don't want anything to happen to you," he continued, "So don't eat the stuffing."

"B-But why—"

"Or the muffins. … Or the gelatin."

And just as he had ghosted over, he went away into the crowd. Mokuba lifted his hand limply and said, "W-Wait a minute…" He looked back down at his plate. He was beginning to question not only the stuffing or muffins or gelatin but everything on the table. He looked up and others seemed to be happy.

Kaiba returned with a plastic fork for Mokuba and a plastic cup full of Sprite.

"Is that all you're going to have?"

"It's the only thing that seems safe. I sniffed it."

Mokuba narrowed his eyes.

"Well, here you go," he said, handing over the fork. "You're sealing your doom, you know."

Mokuba bit into it viciously and began to chew. "There's nothing wrong with this turk—"

"AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!"

All of a sudden, yells of disgust and horror erupted just to the right of the two brothers. People spitting and gagging, throwing their plates to the ground. Everyone was pointing and shouting at an Asian man who had backed up to a cubicle, trapped.

Mokuba ran over after swallowing his burnt bird quickly. "Hey, hey!" he called, shooing the mob away from the poor man. "What's going on over here?"

"This sick freak ruined our Thanksgiving!"

Mokuba looked at him.

"I didn't know! No one told me!" he pleaded.

"Didn't know what?" Mokuba asked, an eyebrow raised.

"The turkey," someone else said, pointing, "isn't really a turkey! It's _dog_!"

Mokuba's face paled.

Kaiba paused and looked to his little brother. "In your _face_."

Mokuba tried to hold back his vomit.

"Listen… turkey, dog, it sounds the same!" the man said in his defense.

"NO IT DOESN'T!" everyone countered.

The rest of the potluck went as Kaiba had expected. The laxatives in the stuffing was discovered and the person who was scheduled to bring the holiday music instead brought satanic death-metal.

The two brothers watched as their workers emptied their stomachs onto the floors and the janitors groaned.

"Oh… Seto, this isn't how I pictured our Thanksgiving potluck at all!"

"It's how I pictured it. Except the dog thing. That was… unexpected."

"Want to try your luck with the toilet paper again?"

"... Sure."

* * *

— Owari —

* * *

Her Sweetness: Well, there you go. Hope this wasn't crap! Please review if you made it through the whole thing, I really want some feedback! Catch you on the flipside! 


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